Breaking Addictions and Changing Habits

We go through life picking up various lifestyle habits and patterns from our parents, from our peers, from our culture in general.  Some manners of life are beneficial to us, some are not.  When addictions or other challenging habits are developed, changing them can be an easy adjustment or a lifetime goal.  Though the time-span of change is very individual, the method and process for change is similar for all.  By understanding these human similarities and using them as guides, we can develop a plot-line for goal achievement and success.

The first step is to acknowledge that change needs to happen. 

How do we know when there is something that we need to change? 

Life just doesn’t feel right.  Things are not easy for us.  We are not happy, fulfilled or thriving.  We feel rushed or tired, angry or complacent.  Our actions are not our best.  Our thoughts are not our best.  We are not “in the groove” with life.

When we become more aware of our lives, we may notice that we might also not enjoy some of the company that we tend to keep.  We may see little value of the exchanges within our relationships.  They could be rife with friction or drain our reserves of time, energy and finances.

The second step is to identify what needs to be altered.

The toughest challenge of changing a habit is identifying what it is that needs to be altered to get the results you truly want.

You’ve been in denial for a while.  It’s comfortable there; you don’t have to think.  You know what to expect.  The pattern is well worn, which is why it’s become habit.  Even though you know life could be better, your faulty logic protests that at the very least, you know the pitfalls of the patterns that you’ve accustomed yourself to accommodating, and you haven’t died yet.  You're just miserably taxed with the lifestyle of trying to avoid falling into them again, or pulling yourself back up and out again and again when you do.  It is a life worn by living in the state of reaction, rather than being conscious, mindful and pro-active.

Do you really want to fly off the handle so easily?  Do you really want to sneak around and feel guilty about overeating, or having an affair, or getting wasted?  Are you tired of hating yourself and tired of how people misperceive you?  At what point will it take for you to know that it’s time to change before there is even more destruction to your self-esteem, your potential and your integrity?  

After becoming aware that there is a habit or pattern that you’d like to change, establishing and manifesting the change becomes the next challenge.  Practice mindfulness in each decision you make, each thought that you create and each action that you choose to display.  Have an accountability system set up for yourself.  Check in with yourself, your friends, your mentors.  Pray for guidance. Ask for help and support when you need it.  Being able to show your vulnerability requires inner strength.   

Distract yourself less; pay attention more. Where are you headed?  With whom are you going? Don’t put yourself on auto-pilot when you are in the driver’s seat of life: remember, you control what direction you are headed.  Never doubt it- this life is yours to steer, so where do you want to go?